You want be at the top of your game, but you are stuck in the past. There are people who have hurt you and you can't reach full productivity because negative thoughts are popping up in your mind. They have a discouraging impact.
Think like this: When you go through life, you're gonna be hurt.
Don't forget, the people who hurt you were doing the best they could in that situation where they were in their journey. So...forgiving...is a gift you deserve.
If you don't forgive you are working like person with a weight on their back.
My question to you is how can you:
-Be at peace
if you are burdened with guilt, hate and shame - living in the past.
These 4 ideas will help you forgive
Feel the feeling, don't escape
When someone had really hurt you, do you escape or do you process it through. Don't repress, go through. Many escape the feeling of pain, anger, rage. If you don't feel the feeling you will repress the feeling into your subconscious. And it will stay there. Everything will be in you and you will walk with it and project on other people. Now you are not living in the moment but you will be looking through the world how you are in your repressed state in pain and anger, guilt and shame. Talk with a friend. Talk it out.
Understand don't judge
We don't know what's going on in the internal orbit of the person that hurt us. Everyone is behaving in the context of their personal reality. They reacted based on their understanding of reality.
Speak your truth even when your voice trembling
It's a sign of self respect. Tell them how you feel. It's gonna release some energy and anger that you feel.
Release don't repress
You see so many people happily smiling and saying I'm fine! But in reality they are still in 1972 with pain suppressing sadness, anger and rage. Feel the feeling. Talk with a friend. Go to the woods and beat a tree with a stick.
Live in the moment and release what happened to you in the past! Otherwise you will be looking at the world through a filter, where the reality is distorted with pain, anger, suffering, rage and hate. Don't make a disfavor to yourself carrying baggage.